Been sitting at the RIT library for a couple of hours finishing up my lesson plan outline while feeling discomfort. Nothing really special is going through my mind, but at the same time little prickly things continue to bother me. My friend once told me that if you make a big deal of things, then they will become a big deal. I agree with her, yet, it is hard to control what should be a big deal or not. Some things are really a BIG deal, but often times, some individuals lose their grip of the situation once time has gone by enough to forget. Again, that may not always be an easy thing to do. I am in the middle of this concept. There are times I let things go for a while, but unfortunately, they later come back. How is this possible? I thought I allowed myself to leave those old notions behind, but they continue to haunt me! Unfair and unfortunate. Nevertheless, I simply want to sit down, have a smoke (nothing illegal) and drink while numbing myself with the music in the background. That is a real Hawthorne thing to do, I suppose.

There are many things I believe in, and even some of these things I have learned to "stretch" for special occasions. But, loyalty is something I believe in religiously (among other things like flossing, trust, faith, and God). Loyalty is sacred to me and once I have been betrayed, it is never the same. But, many a times, I let things go, or try to. Believe in yourself first.

"Pick up the bags, get in the limousine...step on the gas and wipe that tear away......."

high-*-dry